this depression shit is getting to be pretty annoying.
i mean, i had a great weekend: fucking got to see a great hardcore gig, the Tame The Tikbalang reunion at Mayric's (it's been a long time since i've screamed so loud and sang along to the songs that inspired me to play music and which i know by heart...) and we played two pretty successful gigs in and out of town. Subic is still great, lots of familiar faces, and Demon Dave from Badburn and Gil Christ lent us their amps so we really had an easy time providing the necessary ear-bleed with mondo gobs of gain and distortion. it has also been a while since i've played such a great set, with my ears ringing so bad that it was wonderful.
but that was last weekend. since monday, i've been in this irritating slump: i can't write, i can't focus and i can't even fucking sleep on time. could this be a case of depression i'm trying to push away to the far back of my mind? i mean, what the fuck is there to be depressed about?
money? no, no one in their right mind would go crazy over that shit.
love life? how can you be depressed over something you don't really have? so no, i don't think that's it.
could it be that being "happy" is quite a feat and so NOT normal that i'm actually having trouble dealing with it? maybe.
holy fuck. this is such a terrible problem to have. i mean, how do you fucking solve a problem like this? fucking shoot yourself in the kneecaps and sprinkle salt and gun powder over the wound then light it up?
i didn't even like Sylvester Stallone. so why is that infamous scene from Rambo III playing over and over again in my mind?
i have no motherfucking idea. it'd be easy to say i'm gay and have this thing for 80s action stars, but fuck... i'm not and i don't.
i better snap out of this soon. fuck, i'm not getting any work done.
anybody want a beer?
+++
Because I'm on the brink of something beautiful
and I want to sing about it...
But I don't know where to begin...
It's never been more perfect being alive.
But don't throw me a line, don't reach out your hand -
I've never been so satisfied.
i mean, i had a great weekend: fucking got to see a great hardcore gig, the Tame The Tikbalang reunion at Mayric's (it's been a long time since i've screamed so loud and sang along to the songs that inspired me to play music and which i know by heart...) and we played two pretty successful gigs in and out of town. Subic is still great, lots of familiar faces, and Demon Dave from Badburn and Gil Christ lent us their amps so we really had an easy time providing the necessary ear-bleed with mondo gobs of gain and distortion. it has also been a while since i've played such a great set, with my ears ringing so bad that it was wonderful.
but that was last weekend. since monday, i've been in this irritating slump: i can't write, i can't focus and i can't even fucking sleep on time. could this be a case of depression i'm trying to push away to the far back of my mind? i mean, what the fuck is there to be depressed about?
money? no, no one in their right mind would go crazy over that shit.
love life? how can you be depressed over something you don't really have? so no, i don't think that's it.
could it be that being "happy" is quite a feat and so NOT normal that i'm actually having trouble dealing with it? maybe.
holy fuck. this is such a terrible problem to have. i mean, how do you fucking solve a problem like this? fucking shoot yourself in the kneecaps and sprinkle salt and gun powder over the wound then light it up?
i didn't even like Sylvester Stallone. so why is that infamous scene from Rambo III playing over and over again in my mind?
i have no motherfucking idea. it'd be easy to say i'm gay and have this thing for 80s action stars, but fuck... i'm not and i don't.
i better snap out of this soon. fuck, i'm not getting any work done.
anybody want a beer?
+++
Because I'm on the brink of something beautiful
and I want to sing about it...
But I don't know where to begin...
It's never been more perfect being alive.
But don't throw me a line, don't reach out your hand -
I've never been so satisfied.
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